Sunday, April 24, 2011

Why do all dogs hate the mailman?

My dogs are...idiots. One is deaf and the other is stupid, so neither listen to me. But they're total marshmallows. The least vicious pit-mixes you've ever met. They just want to be loved. A combined total of 140 LBS of lap dogs.

About 3 years ago, my house was robbed while I was at work. I was traumatized, but the dogs were fine. I'm sure they thought whoever was breaking in was here to bring them treats. But if you're on my front porch, they HATE you. As long as you're not in the house, it's pit bull mohawk time. Barking and frothing at the mouth. Once one foot is in the door, they just want to sniff your butt.

While guests are greeted with teeth and loudness, the one person that's most hated is the mailman. Both dogs freak out when they see the blue-suited mail carrier wander up to the mailbox. I keep meaning to leave a not apologizing for their behavior on the porch. I'm not alone on this one. Every other dog owner I know claims that the mailman is the most hated by even the most docile dogs.

So, what happens when your dog can't see the mailman? How do they chase/menace government employees if they're blind? Apparently, a guide goose is the way to go. Totally not kidding.

Maybe, I can get one of the rats living in my back yard to teach my dogs to sit. Hmm, probably not.


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